Sunday, January 20, 2008

AT A CROSSROADS

I KNEW THIS YEAR WOULD START OUT WITH ITS SHARE OF PROBLEMS

I HAVE ALOT OF DECISIONS TO MAKE IN A SMALL AMOUNT OF TIM
SO MANY GOOD THINGS HAVE BEEN HAPPENING LATELY , BUT LIKE ANYTHING ELSE, THEN SHIT STARTS TO HAPPEN.
I FOUND OUT RECENTLY THAT EVERYONE AT WORK READS THIS BLOG...FOR HOW LONG I DONT KNOW. BUT I AM TOLD SOME PEOPLE ARE NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT, BUT YET HAVENT TOLD ME SO. ILL SAY THIS WORK TAKES ENOUGH TOF MY TIME, SO WHAT I DO OUTSIDE OF WORK TRULY IS MY BUSINESS SO I WONT BE CENSORED HERE. BAD ENOUGH I HAVE TO CHECK MY BALLS 90% OF THE TIME ANYWAY. I GENUINELY LIKE THE PEOPLE I WORK WITH, AND I DONT FAKE IT, I KEEP IT VERY REAL..BUT I DO HAVE TO CHECK MY BALLS TO KEEP THE PEACE. SO THERE ITS SAID. I AM TYPING THINKING, AM I GOING TO PISS EVERYONE OFF..THATS NOT MY POINT..BUT THE POINT OF THIS BLOG IS FOR ME TO RANT IN CYBERSPACE SO I AM GOING TO CONTINUE TO
WITH THAT SAD, WORK IS GREAT. TOM AND MAGGIE HAVE BEEN DOING THEIR THING, AS HAVE I. WE ARE DOING OUR SHOW CARDS AND EXPECTING A GOOD SEASON(IF YOU CAN EVER REALLY HAVE A GOOD SEASON IN NYC).
RAN INTO MY EX , THE EX OF MINE WHO FAILED TO TELL ME HE WAS DATING A STRIPPER (FEMALE) AND GOT HER PREGNANT YEARS AGO. YEAH THAT LIL TREASURE, LOL. SAW HIM IN SOUTH BEACH AND THEN HE KEPT ON CALLING AND CALLING AND UGH....I AM LOST..SOMEONE SHOWS ME ATTENTION AND I ACT LIKE ITS MY DUTY TO LAP IT UP LIKE A THRISTY FARM ANIMAL.
LIKE I SAID I HAVE DECISIONS TO MAKE. I AM VERY IN LOVE WITH MY MAN, BUT THE FACT THAT I HAVE TO KEEP IT SO UNDDER WRAPS MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO ENJOY IT FULLY. SO I DONT..ITS SO D.L. THAT I HAVE TO THINK IS IT REAL? I AM PUSHING 40(FUCK!) AND I REALLY NEED TO BE WITH THE ONE(OR DO I?..ISNT 4 THE NEW 30? DONT I GET A FEW MORE YEARS OUT OF THIS?). I AM , AND WILL CONTINUE TO DO WHAT I THINK I HAVE TO ON THE LOVE TIP, BUT I AM TIRED OF HAVING TO HIDE IT FROM MYSELF .
MY SISTER AND THE KIDS ARE HERE, SO I HAVE TO GO
SENDING LOVE AND LIGHT
PLEASE DO THE SAME
BESOS
J

2 comments:

Lynn & Horst said...

Dearest j,
your words are so pure, kind of 'unsugared'. You write beautifully and alarmingly honest, unselfconscious and super sexy,
i really love participating in your life and sharing your thoughts.

COACD said...

so deep.

LIVING

YES WE DID

YES WE DID
PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA

About Me

MODELHOMEPROJECT.COM

MODELHOMEPROJECT.COM
LOOK OUT FOR NYC FUNDRAISERS SOON

MY NEPHEWS...PHILIP, NICHOLAS AND JOSHUA

MY NEPHEWS...PHILIP, NICHOLAS AND JOSHUA

NATE GILL

NATE GILL
OUR NEXT BIG THANG

FOUR OF MY FAVORITE GIRLS

FOUR OF MY FAVORITE GIRLS
JESS, COURT, P, AND MY LOVE JENN (IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER)

ITS MAJOR

ITS MAJOR
SESSILEE LOPEZ FOR VOGUE ITALY

KERRY DEGMAN

KERRY DEGMAN
BREAKING BARRIERS

ONE OF MY FAVE ARTISTS

ONE OF MY FAVE ARTISTS
AMY WINEHOUSE

HOTTEST PIC EVER

HOTTEST PIC EVER
PH:STEVEN KLEIN

NATE NESBITT

NATE NESBITT
THE MOST UNAFFECTED GUY I REPRESENT..GOOD SOLID KID.

BLAINE COOK

BLAINE COOK
GIVENCHY PARIS

SIMON NESSMAN AT GIVENCHY

SIMON NESSMAN AT GIVENCHY

CHAD WHITE

CHAD WHITE
LEGENDARY

TRAVIS DAVENPORT

TRAVIS DAVENPORT
ALWAYS LOOKING GOOD

TERRON WOOD

TERRON WOOD
THE MOST FOCUSED MODEL I REP

TRAVIS HANSON

TRAVIS HANSON
HARD WORK PAYS OFF...NO SHORTCUTS

MR CHRIS COLLINS

MR CHRIS COLLINS
THE LEGENDARY CHRIS COLLINS

CHANNING TATUM

CHANNING TATUM
BLOWING SH*T UP, SON