Thursday, April 10, 2008

THAT OPRAH "AH-HAH" MOMENT

I ACTUALLY THINK THE OLD LIGHTBULB HAS GONE OFF ABOVE MY HEAD
TODAY, THIS DAY, AS I TYPE SOMETHING HAS WASHED OVER ME. A SORT OF NEWNESS. I AM UNSURE EXACTLY WHAT IT IS, BUT ITS A SORT OF CALLING..A CALL TO ARMS PERHAPS.
I HAVE FOR YEARS LAMENTED ON THINGS; BLAMING CIRCUMSTANCES ETC ON WHY THINGS ARE(WERE) THE WAY THEY ARE(WERE) AND I REALIZE THAT SIMPLY I HAVE MANIFESTED ALL OF IT. I AM TOTALLY IN CONTROL OF MY DESTINY. IN FACT, I AM THE AUTHOR OF IT ALL.
I STUDIED KABBALLAH FOR YEARS. IT HELPED ME IN WATCHING MY REACTIVITY. THINK ABOUT WHAT I AM GOING TO SAY BEFORE I SAY IT. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY ETC. AS AN AGENT, ITS HARD TO TAKE THOSE FEW MOMENTS AND NOT REACT WHEN SO MUCH IS ABOUT INSTINCT. SO I HAVE HAD TO MODIFY IT, AND ITS BEEN HELPFUL. MY TEAM AT WORK PROBABLY DOESNT NOTICE IT, AS I AM ALWAYS BANGING ON ABOUT SOMETHING BUT THATS THE GIG. ANYWAY, WHAT I FORGOT WAS THAT I AM TOTALLY IN CONTROL OF HOW THINGS WORK IN MY WORLD. I AM USUALLY SO BENT OUT OF SHAPE ON WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF ME, AND I REALIZE THAT DOESNT MATTER EITHER.

I FEEL RENEWED.

MY WORK IS VERY IMPORTANT, AS ARE THE PEOPLE I WORK WITH, BUT ITS NOT ALL I AM. I HAVE LOVE IN MY LIFE, BUT MORESO I HAVE LOVE FOR MYSELF. I USED EVERY EXCUSE(USUALLY WORK) TO NOT DEAL WITH ME. I HAVE RESENTED PEOPLE WHO SEEM TO PUT THEMSELVES FIRST(AT TIMES) AND NOT BE LESS SELFLESS...WHATS WRONG WITH BEING A LITTLE SELFISH? NOTHING!!!!!! NOT A THING! LOL.

I ASK WHOMEVER READS THIS TO SEND WARM WHITE LIGHT MY WAY, AS THATS ALL I WILL BE SENDING.

SEE YA

J

4 comments:

tmarkum said...

I wish I actually knew you to sit down and talk, there are so many parallels it seems. I am sending you all the positive energy I can and can only hope for the same. I am at a crossroads in my life and it's both needed and appreciated.

ty said...

wow. i feel like what i just read, at least most of it, i wrote myself. theres still alot of change needed, but i feel like i'm on the right path, as i hope you are too.

IT IS WHAT IT IS said...

ITS A GOOD THING THEM, IF WE ARE ALL FEELING THIS WAY. ITS A SHIFT IN CONCIOUSNESS. MAKES ME FEEL EVEN BETTER KNOWING THAT I AM NOT ALONE IN IT.
I FEEL GOOD
TODAY WAS A GOOD DAY

newwavegurly said...

I will happily send warm light your way, my friend.

*hug*

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